Rewriting History
by velmavontussle
Summary: Glimpses into Lily and Rufus' life together. Later chapters will include BlairChuck, SerenaDan and NateJenny.
1. Rewriting History

'Lily.' Rufus spotted her immediately; her blonde hair was loose and messily tangled due to nervously combing her fingers through it too frequently. She wore a white evening gown that was revealing in all the right places and her eyes were completely dry. She raised her brown eyes to peer at him through her mascara-coated eyelashes. She smiled weakly at him and he jogged lightly towards her.

'Hello Rufus.' she spoke calmly and her voice didn't quaver for a second.

'Lily, are you ok?' he placed his hand on her silk covered knee and her smile grew slightly.

'I'm fine.' She reassured, placing her hand over his. 'That's the problem.' she whispered as she laced her fingers with his. 'My husband is dead. But all I can think about is you.' She cast her eyes downward to avoid his gaze and took back her hand. He immediately missed the contact. 'I know, I know, I'm a horrible person. Bartholomew Bass' heart stopped beating exactly twenty-four minutes ago and all I felt was a twinge of sadness, a lot of confusion and a hint of relief.' She ran her fingers through her hair for the hundredth time in five minutes and he struggled to not smile. 'I know I picked Bart, I know that. But Bart was like a hideous Chanel dress that I though would fit me perfectly, but turned out to be cold and far too tight, almost suffocating in fact. But you were a stunning Gap dress that actually fit me perfectly but I left on the shelf because my mother would have a fit if I ever wore Gap. But then the gaudy Chanel dress got into a car crash and I realised that the Gap dress was the one, that you're the one. And what kills me is that I think I've known that since I was eighteen and I introduced you to Rosewood and we made love in the hay.' That was when Lily began to cry. Not just because she had lost her husband, but also because she had screwed things up far too many times with the love of her life. Countless times, in fact, so she was shocked when Rufus took her into his arms while she sobbed.


	2. The Apartment

'Rufus, I don't know how to tell them.' Lily sat on Rufus' couch and nervously played with her hair.

'Lily – relax.' She glared at him and he immediately thought of the old saying _'if looks could kill'_.

'Don't tell me to relax Rufus, because I assure you that I won't.'

'Five minutes.' He taunted and her eyes narrowed even more, if that was possible.

'Stop that.' He collapsed next to her and wrapped his arms around her shoulders. Despite her annoyance, she instantly cuddled into him. 'They reacted so well to us dating, but how will they react to us moving in together in an apartment we already bought in Soho. I mean, Jenny only just came back to her senses –' he silenced her with his lips and she eagerly responded. But after one minute of duelling with their tongues, Lily abruptly pushed him away. 'Stop distracting me Rufus.'

'You'll be fine sweetheart.' He whispered into her ear before brushing his lips lightly against her forehead.

'Don't you dare sweetheart me.' She lowered her head back onto his chest and nervously tapped her foot against the plush sofa cushions. Just as they settled into a comfortable silence, they were interrupted by four teenagers bursting in thought the door.

'Hey mom. Rufus. What was so urgent?' Serena asked, clutching her beaded Fendi bag.

'Well, there's no easy way to say this, so why don't you –'

'We're moving in together.' Rufus interrupted and Lily exhaled as loudly as she could. But Lily's eyes expanded as soon as she saw her daughter's grin.

'Congratulations!' she laughed, throwing her arms around Rufus.

'Yeah, congrats.' Smiled Jenny, hugging a still shocked Lily.

'But you – you're all okay with this?' Jenny released Lily who immediately stood up and stared at Serena, waiting for an answer from the girl who, over a year ago, had told her to leave the love of her life and marry someone else.

'Mom, Dan and I are just friends now and Rufus makes you happy. Happier than I've ever seen you, actually. I'm done being selfish.' She wrapped her arms around her mother as tightly as she could. 'You have my blessing.' She joked before letting go of Lily and exclaiming 'So come on, let's celebrate! Dan, put on a Lincoln Hawk CD and Eric, pour the champagne – or orange juice.' She quickly corrected herself once her eyes met Rufus'. As their children laughed and absorbed some of Serena's hyper energy, Lily smiled with relief and moved closer to Rufus. His hand found hers and he squeezed as tightly as he could.

And she squeezed back.


	3. It Feels Like Home

'We are officially moved in!' Lillian van der Woodsen exclaimed, collapsing on the king size bed she shared with her boyfriend Rufus Humphrey, who was currently in his pajamas and reading a book by John Grisham.

'What made it so official?' he asked, glancing up at her over his book.

'Serena finally unpacked that vintage lamp that Anne Archibald gave her for her twelfth birthday.'

'This is a huge moment.' Rufus joked, putting down his book on his bedside table.

'I know.' She laughed, standing up to search for her black, silk excuse for a nightgown. Rufus loved it, so she bought five in a variety of colors. 'I think we should celebrate.' She called from the closet as she continued her search.

'How?' he asked as she came back into the room.

'There it is!' she yelled as soon as she saw the flimsy pajama thrown on the floor due to the previous night's activities. 'And in answer to your question, we should order Chinese, make out a little and go to sleep by ten.'

'Our lives are so exciting.'

'Very funny. Do you want excitement because I can score invites to a Tinsley Mortimer soiree.' She stated sarcastically as she threw off her Prada dress and replaced it with her La Perla pajama.

'All I want is you.' She laughed loudly as she climbed onto their bed and cuddled up to the love of her life.

'That wasn't cheesy at all.' But she still smiled despite her cynical nature.

'I love you.' He stated simply, and she grinned against his shoulder.

'I love you too.' She replied, gently brushing her lips against his. 'So … Lily and Rufus live together.' She stated as she lay her head back onto Rufus' chest.

'Yep. They certainly do.'

'Who would've guessed that we'd up exactly where we were twenty years ago?' He absent-mindedly played with her hair while she talked.

'I wouldn't have it any other way.' She smiled up at him and rewarded his kind words with another kiss.

'I'm not hungry anymore. Wanna skip ahead to the make out? Maybe more?' Soon her was pinning her down to the bed and their lips were moving together. And she was deliriously happy.


	4. Mary Me A Little

Lily van der Woodsen ran though the streets of downtown New York. The wind whipped back her blonde hair and caused her to shiver as her purple Tory Burch flats skidded across the pavement. Her brown eyes brightened as soon as she saw her boyfriend standing in front of a Laundromat, holding three massive laundry bags.

'Hey. I'm sorry I'm late, but I overslept which is why I look like shit.' She indicated at her black Juicy Couture sweatpants, Chloe t-shirt and purple Burberry raincoat. She stepped forward and lightly kissed him on the cheek. 'Do you want me to take one for you?' He merely stared at her, captivated by something. 'What's wrong, do I have something in my teeth?'

'Screw this.' was his answer, and her face immediately screwed up in confusion. But her eyes widened when he got down on one knee.

'Rufus. What are you doing?' There were blocking the entrance to the Laundromat and rain was pouring down on them but she couldn't care less.

'Something I've been trying to do for weeks. But you've been proposed to so many times that I wanted to make it really special.' Her eyes filled with tears as soon as she heard the word proposed. 'But looking at you now I realize that all that mattes is spending the rest of life with you. And I know I said that I wanted to take things slow, but that just doesn't apply to you. I've spent twenty years without you – and I'd love to spend the next twenty, and forever, with you. I love you, Lillian Rhodes-' she laughed at the use of her maiden name. 'Will you marry me?'

'Yes.' She grinned. Her hair was now soaking wet and plastered to her face, but as he placed the engagement ring on her finger, she never felt more beautiful, or happy. 'Perfect fit.' He whispered and kissed her with all the intensity he could muster.

'We're engaged!' she laughed happily. 'And I'm pregnant.'

Now it was his turn to be shocked.


	5. Maybe This Time

'Geoffrey, I need this dress to be perfect.' Lily van der Woodsen stared at her reflection in the floor length mirror. 'I'm sorry, but this just isn't it.'

'But sweetheart – it's Vera Wang.' Geoffrey Schott stood behind Lily, cradling three of her latest rejects. 'Why this need for perfection?'

'Well, this is my final wedding so I want –'

'Your final wedding? I don't think you even said that the first time. Tell me all about him.' Geoffrey had successfully planned all four of her weddings, and she trusted him to pull this one off in the two-month time slot she had set for him.

'His name is Rufus Humphrey – hand me the next one.' He passed her a Carolina Herrera dress and she took it into the dressing room. 'He's from Brooklyn.'

'Ew.' was Geoffrey's response.

'Be nice. He is far from rich, was my first … everything and is the love of my life.' She shouted over the dressing room door, before opening it and stepping out.

'Oh my God.' He exhaled. 'It's perfect. You look even better than Sarah Jessica Parker did when she wore it for the Vogue photoshoot in the Sex and the City movie.'

'I'm not going to pretend to know what that means, but thanks Geoff. Let me have a look in the mirror.' As soon as she caught her reflection, her eyes filled with tears. 'That's it.'

***

'Hey.' Lily smiled as she approached her fiancé, kissing him softly on the lips. 'I found a dress – well, the dress.'

'That's great news.' He grinned, lacing his fingers with hers.

'2 weeks till the wedding and 4 weeks before I start to show.' The reason they had set their wedding date two months after the proposal as for the benefit of her mother. She took the news of their engagement surprising well (she only threatened to disinherit her once), and they didn't want to ruin that with a pre-marriage pregnancy.

'This is really happening.'

'Yup.' He squeezed her hand as tightly as possible and her smile only grew.


	6. Can I Have This Dance?

Serena van der Woodsen and Blair Waldorf stood next to each other, watching couple twirl on the ballroom floor.

'This has been, by far, your mother's best wedding ever. Geoffrey has outdone himself.' Complimented Blair, drowning her gin martini.

'Well, that's probably because Rufus is my mother's best husband ever. For the first time in my life, I actually like my stepfather. Hey, where's Chuck?' Serena asked, mixing her margarita with a cocktail stick.

'Getting me a drink. Everything's going so perfectly S. It's like Bart dying helped so many relationships.'

'B!' Serena thwacked Blair lightly on the arm, rolling her eyes as she sipped at her drink.

'Okay, I take it back. Bart's death was a terrible tragedy, but look at everything that's come from it. I mean, look at how happy they are.' Blair pointed at the happy couple, who were laughing as Rufus attempted to spin her around. 'And she looks beautiful. What a gorgeous dress. I always say that Carolina Herrera is the way to go.'

'They are happy, aren't they.' Serena smiled as her mother kissed Rufus gently.

'Happy is an understatement. And, for the first time ever, she picked stunning bridesmaid dresses. I mean, these are perfect.' Blair twirled around in her purple Oscar de la Renta gown, giggling as her martini flew of her glass and onto the purple carpet. 'Oops!'

'It's a good thing Chuck's getting you another drink. I'm going to be a sister, again.' Blurted out Serena, completely changing the topic of conversation.

'Oh, I know. Nobody plans a wedding in a month and a half for no reason. Congratulations S. That's great news.' Blair hugged her best friend tightly, grinning when she saw Charles Bass approaching her, holding two drinks in his hands. 'Excuse me Serena, my prince charming is here.' And off skipped Blair, leaving Serena to watch the dancing couples, most importantly Lily and Rufus. And, for the first time in a long time, she missed Dan.


	7. Boy or Girl?

'I want to know Rufus.' Insisted Lily Humphrey, sitting on top of the examining table, her hands resting on her swollen stomach.

'Well, I don't.' argued Rufus, standing by her side. Their doctor stood awkwardly by the fetal monitor, quietly contemplating the possibility of leaving the room.

'Honestly Rufus, we are leaving for the Hamptons in half an hour. We do not have time for this! Dr. Harris, we would like to know the sex of the baby.'

'That's great.' Awkwardly squeaked out the doctor, more than ready to do her job. 'Now lie back and-'

'No, we wouldn't. Can you just do a quick check-up?' interrupted Rufus, who was met with a glare from his wife.

'Rufus, I am going to push your child out of my body in three months, so I think I have a larger say in this. We're spending the next month in South Hampton with the kids, and I would really like to know what gender my child is so my daughter, who's only home for two weeks due to Spring Break, and I can go shopping for our child. And no, I will not make him or her wear yellow because have you ever seen a boy wearing yellow? And furthermore –'

'Ok!' burst out Rufus, utterly exhausted by her speech. 'Anything to get you to shut up.' Lily laughed, squeezing his hand with gratitude.

'Wonderful.' Sighed Dr. Harris with relief. 'Now lift your shirt and lie back, this might be a little cold.' Lily followed the young doctor's instructions, but she never let go of her husband's hand.

'Ok, let's see what we have here…' Lily and Rufus stared at the monitor, never growing tired of looking at their child. 'Congratulations, it's a girl.' Lily's eyes instantly filled with tears. 'I'll give you two a moment.' Lucinda Harris left the room, leaving a stunned Lily and Rufus to really react.

'A girl.' Rufus whispered, still completely and utterly shocked.

'Yeah.' Exhaled Lily, nodding repeatedly. 'We're having a girl.'

'Wow.'


	8. The Odd Couple

'Hello Blair.' Lily Humphrey smiled as she saw Blair Cornelia Waldorf enter the room, clutching her small Gucci purse.

'Hi Lily. I thought I should come in and offer my congratulations.' Her Manolo Blanhik heels clicked on the floor as she approached her best friend's mother. 'Can I?'

'Of course.' Lily beamed as she passed Blair her newborn daughter, Willow Jane Humphrey.

'She's beautiful.' Willow's brown eyes met Blair's and she was instantly smitten with this tiny creature. 'Lily, I just have to say that I admire you so much.'

'For what?' asked Lily, shifting in the small hospital bed.

'For marrying the love of your life, even though he's from Brooklyn, and ignoring your children's complicated past and letting love win.'

'Thank you. Well, I'm happier than I've ever been so I guess I admire myself too for having the courage to let myself be happy.' Lily passed Blair a tissue to wipe off the spit up that Willow had just produced.

'That is so poetic.' Sighed Blair, wiping Willow's small chubby face as gently as possible.

'You really love Chuck don't you?'

'More than anything. He makes me feel complete. I know it's cheesy but I really want it to work. That's why I admire you so much for marrying Rufus – you never gave up on love.' Lily fought the urge to laugh as she listened to the world's former cynic become love's number one fan.

'Well, look at you Blair. You're turning into a wonderful person. I mean, Willow spit up on you and you couldn't care less about the possibility that it would ruin your Balenciaga dress.'

'Thanks Lily. Well, it's not so much me growing up; it's more so the fact that in high school being bitch and demanding made you popular, but at Yale it's all about maturity and elegance.' They both laughed, knowing that that had little to do with the changed in her personality,

'You're good with her.' Observed Lily, taking a glass of water from her beside table.

'Really? I don't know, she just seems to really like me.' Smiled Blair, gently rocking the baby in her thin arms.

'Blair, I know this might be an odd question, but would you be Willow's godmother?' Blair tried to stop her mouth from falling open as Lily's words washed over her.

'Why me?' squeaked a shocked Blair.

'Well, Willow's from two worlds – the Upper East Side and Brooklyn – so I thought it would be interesting to have her godparents be the extreme of both. Dan will be her godfather – and I was undecided about her godmother until you came in here. Blair, you're a good person, despite growing up in a way that would make anybody crazy. In fact, it's what got you into Yale. Plus, a one-day-old baby is instinctively responding positively to you. That has to be a sign, right.' Lily stopped rambling and waited for Blair's response.

'I'd be honored. Thank you for this, really. You don't know how much this means to me.' Blair would have hugged Lily, a woman who'd always sort of been a replacement mother to her, but she was still cradling a blinking Willow. 'Is it okay if I take her outside to meet everyone? Chuck, Nate, Cyrus and my mom are waiting outside to see her.'

'Of course. You're her godmother, do what you want. But please bring her back in fifteen minutes.' Lily tried not to let the need for her baby daughter show. Blair grinned at Lily.

'Sure.' Blair walked towards the door and just before her manicured hand turned the metal doorknob, Rufus Humphrey burst into the room. 'You two have fun.' Blair smiled before marching out of the room and spending fourteen minutes cooing over Willow with her far from perfect boyfriend. But he was perfect for her.


	9. I Am Changing

'She finally stopped screaming.' Rejoiced Lillian Humphrey as she entered her bedroom; leaving the door slightly ajar in case Willow woke up again.

'Thank God.' Sighed Rufus Humphrey, shifting to make room for his wife on their bed. She lifted the Egyptian cotton sheets and slid under the covers, cuddling up to Rufus as soon as her body was wrapped in the warm duvet. 'Jenny came in here five minutes ago threatening to move to Alaska and shoot moose with Sarah Palin if Willow didn't shut up.'

'That bad?' asked Lily, fiddling with the silk material of her pyjamas. 'I know she wakes up at unfortunate moments, but she's only three months old.' Rufus reached over and turned off the small lamp by their bed. They lay in silence, their eyes slowly accustoming to the darkness before Lily spoke again. 'This is really great.'

'What is?' asked Rufus, his arms still tightly encircled around his wife.

'I've spent practically ever minute of her life so far with her. God, with Serena and Eric I just left them at home with the nanny. I feel like I'm starting over, I'm finally in a marriage I know will last and I have a daughter who I will raise. Not some stranger from Mexico me. That just … it feels great.'

'Well, you're a really great mom.' She inclined her head to stare at him, and even in the dark, her brown eyes pierced his.

'Thank you.' He could feel her smile as she kissed him.


	10. Welcome To The Jungle

Jennifer Humphrey sat on a polished wooden bench, her head resting on Nathaniel Archibald's shoulder. She shifted slightly in her pink Chanel dress, a gift from her stepmother, to stare at various people who were entering the church. She smiled when she saw her stepsister, Serena van der Woodsen, enter through the open glass door. Serena's Miu Miu heels clicked on the marble floor as she walked towards Jenny, taking a seat next to her.

'Serena!' exclaimed Jenny, hugging her tightly. 'I didn't know you were coming home for this! Lily will be thrilled.'

'Oh, she knows. She picked Saturday for a reason. Blair, Dan and I took the company jet from Yale.' Serena smoothed out her blue Yves Saint Laurent dress before crossing her long legs.

'Well, it's a surprise for me. Nate came, but he goes to Columbia. Plus, he's expected to visit me at least once a fortnight.' Jenny squeezed her boyfriend's hand and Serena noticed his presence for the first time.

'Hey Nate, how are you?'

'I'm great. Hey, is Chuck here?' Nate asked, scanning the room to look for his best friend.

'Making out with Blair outside. He took an earlier flight from Yale and they didn't see each other for several hours, which I just too long.' Sarcastically replied Serena, though she was thrilled for her best friend and former stepbrother.

'Charming. Serena, you'll never guess what happened the other –' Nate was suddenly interrupted by chords of music echoing through the large church, politely telling everyone to shut up. Blair and Dan were the first to enter the church (with Chuck sneaking in oh-so-subtly behind Blair.) Blair looked flawless in a strapless, sapphire Nina Ricci dress, which she had paired with black Marni heels. Dan on the other hand looked … adorable in his attempt at a decent suit. Once they both reached the altar, Blair grinned at Serena, accepting for the first time in her life that today wasn't about her. It was about seven month old Willow Jane Humphrey, who was now making her grand entrance in Lillian Humphrey's arms. Willow clutched at her mother's purple Zac Posen dress as they made their way towards Dan and Blair; completely clueless that today was her day, her baptism. And as Lily passed her daughter to Rufus, Willow let out such a pure and innocent giggle that everyone in the room fell in love with her.


	11. Til There Was You

'I want a Jack Torres chocolate cake and I want it to be perfect.' Lily Humphrey demanded into her cell phone as she stood over her stove, slowly stirring tomato sauce. 'Now, the guest list. Take the following names to the calligrapher I hope you've hired by now: Serena Cecelia van der Woodsen, Blair Cornelia Waldorf, Charles Bartholomew Bass, Jennifer Humphrey, Nathaniel Archibald, Daniel Humphrey, Vanessa Abrams, Eleanor Waldorf-Rose, Cyrus Rose, Eric van der Woodsen and Cecelia Rhodes.'

'That's it?' timidly asked Rebecca Nielsen, a young woman who was currently working as a temp for the notorious Levana Jordan, New York's very best and incredibly overpriced party planner. Rebecca had to deal with a lot of spoilt, demanding women but Lillian Humphrey was by far the worst of the bunch.

'Yes. I'm not filling my daughter's birthday party with society nobodies like you might expect, but with people she loves. Now, I'm thinking of a purple and green color scheme since Willow adores Barney. But everything else is up to Levana. Tell her to call me as soon as possible.'

'Of course Mrs. Humphrey.' Smiled Rebecca, secretly thrilled to end this hour-long conversation.

'Bye Becky.'

'Rebecca.' Answered the temp, trying to not let the annoyance show in her tone.

'Right.' Lily hung up before adding a pinch of salt to the mixture and stirring once again. She felt bad about treating Becca or whatever her name was so badly, but she wanted the very best party for her little girl and good things only come to those who demand them. Just as she poured the sauce over whole-wheat penne pasta, her husband burst in through the door.

'You're home early.' Exclaimed a surprised Lily, still working on their dinner. 'You always stay late at the gallery on Thursdays.' Rufus walked up to his wife, snaking his arms around her thin waist and kissing her on the cheek.

'I asked Vanessa to lock up. I wanted to see you. Is willow still awake?' he asked hopefully.

'Sorry sweetie, I put her to bed half an hour ago. We spent all day at the park feeding ducks, or in her case chasing them, and she was absolutely exhausted. But –' she turned in her husband's arms so she was facing his slightly disappointed face. 'Jenny and Eric left this morning to tour Yale, so we have the apartment all to ourselves.'

'Really?' he wiggled his eyebrows up and down, causing his wife to laugh and link her arms around his neck.

'Food first.' She quickly pecked him on the lips before turning around to resume cooking their meal.

'Why?' he protested whilst wrapping his arms around her tighter and resting his head on her shoulder.

'Because I actually cooked!'

'Exactly. Do you blame me for being scared at the prospect of eating it?'

'Shut up.' She giggled, playfully elbowing him in the side. 'Here – try it.' She stabbed the pasta with a fork before feeding it to her resistant husband.

'Mmm. Not bad Humphrey.' He grinned at her and she couldn't help but grin back. And she certainly could help but kiss him with all the passion she could muster. They eventually pulled back, panting.

'Rufus, I'm hungry.'

'Then let's eat.'

'I'm not hungry for food.' She smiled coyly before kissing him again.

'Oh.' His eyes filled with understanding and a hint of mischief. 'Not that I'm complaining, but what about the pasta?'

'I guess it's a good thing that we have a microwave.'


	12. Angels in America

'They're too young.' Mumbled Lily Humphrey to her husband as they stood in an elevator, heading up towards Eleanor Waldorf's penthouse apartment.

'They're in love.' Defended Rufus, squeezing his wife's right hand.

'They're only 21 years old!' countered Lily, pulling her hand away and then linking her arm through his to replace the contact.

'How old were we when we got those matching tattoos?' Silence filled the elevator for a few moments.

'Point taken.' Suddenly the elevator doors opened, revealing a glowing, elegant Blair Waldorf laughing in her fiancés arms. Serena was the first to spot them and her smile instantly widened.

'Hey mom! Hi Rufus.' She walked up towards them, her Valentino dress swishing with each step. 'Willow's been having the best time.' As if on cue, Willow Humphrey shimmied down from Nate Archibald's arms and ran towards her parents.

'Mama.' She giggled as Lily picked her up. It was unusual for a baby to be at an engagement party at eight o'clock in the evening, but she was there under her godmother's insistence.

'Have you been behaving yourself angel?' Lily cooed, tucking one of Willow's blonde ringlets behind her ear.

'Woof!' barked Willow, who received bursts of laughter from her Upper East Side fan club.

'She's been doing her impression of a dog all day.' Grinned Blair, sauntering towards the crowd.

'Blair!' exclaimed Willow, laughing as her godmother approached her.

'Lily, please don' take her home now. It's my engagement party, and I want Willow to be in attendance.' Willow nodded her one-year-old head, even though she had no idea what was going on.

'Sorry Blair, but it's way past her bedtime.'

'Fine, I can tell when I've lost. But can you two at least stay?' begged Blair, settling her lips into her signature pout.

'Blair – I'm impressed, you've learnt the art of compromise. We would love to stay.' Smiled Rufus, unlinking his arm from his wife's death grip and throwing it around her shoulders instead. 'Jenny's babysitting Willow tonight, so we're free to stick around.'

'But you can't take Little J with you!'

'Yes they can, I have to study for my finals and Willow's a great study buddy. Aren't you sis?' Jenny scooped Willow into her arms, who was suddenly aware that they were leaving.

'No, no, no.' repeated Willow, furiously shaking her head, causing her blonde ringlets to bounce up and down.

'Sorry kiddo, we've gotta go.' Jenny kissed Nate goodbye before running off in her four-inch silver Marc Jacobs heels. 'Bye Dad, Lily. Congratulations Blair.' Even though Willow was still fairly upset about having to leave, she still wanted to bid her adoring crowd goodbye, so she peered over her sister's shoulder and began to blow kisses to the room of people who were all staring at her. Lily, Blair and Serena blew Willow a kiss back while giggling hysterically.

'Lily, she's precious.' Chuck commented, stepping forward to reunite with his fiancé.

'Isn't she?'


	13. Scream

**Hey guys. I just want to thank everyone who's reviewed, especially Sophia-Chad and Lylirium, you guys rock! However, I don't know if I'm going to continue this story because I don't get as many reviews as I would like. So if ANY of you are reading this story, just let me know what you think ;) I just want to make it to 26 reviews, because then I'll have two per chapter. And as for D/S queries, in the next chapter Serena will admit that she still has feelings for her stepbrother ;)**

Lily Humphrey ran through the emergency room as quickly as she possibly could. She couldn't think, all she could do was put one foot in front of the other as she tried to reach her destination. As she finally reached the waiting room, she didn't think of how much her feet hurt from running in stiletto heels or of the bags of newly purchased clothes she had left behind at Barneys, she couldn't think of those things because her mind was flooded with one word: Willow.

'Lily.' Rufus went up to her, looking just as petrified as her.

'What happened?' demanded Lily, her hands clenched into small fists.

'She fell off the jungle gym. She needs five stitches on her right arm, but she'll be fine.' Rufus attempted to reassure Lily and himself.

'Why weren't you watching her?' Lily snapped, glaring at her husband. The last thing she wanted to do was fight with Rufus, but she was upset and emotional and couldn't control what was leaving her mouth.

'Accidents happen Lil.' He reached for her hand but she angrily shrugged him away.

'They shouldn't happen. Not to Willow, she's not even two years old Rufus! What possessed you to let her play on a jungle gym?' she yelled, digging her fingernails into her skin. Anyone would have defended themselves and gotten furious, but Rufus knew Lily and he knew that there was more to her anger.

'What's really bothering you Lil?' His ability to see right through her only made her feel worse.

'I'm sorry for blowing up at you. I just can't help but wonder what would've happened if she fell on her head instead of her arm.' Tears formed in her eyes and Rufus instinctively pulled her into his arms. 'And I wasn't there.' She wailed desperately, letting her tears fall. 'I wasn't there to hold her hand while they stitched her up. This had been the most traumatic moment of her life, and I wasn't there because I was looking for a flower girl dress that she could wear to Blair and Chuck's wedding. I can't lose her.'

'Lil –she's fine.' He attempted to reassure her, rubbing soothing circles into her back.

'But what if she wasn't Rufus? What if we had lost her?' Lily sobbed into his chest, clutching his shirt tightly in her hands.

'Lil, she's ok. Her arm's gonna hurt for a while but she'll heal pretty quickly. And she wants to see you.' Her sobs suddenly ceased and her glassy eyes met his.

'Really?' she asked hopefully, tears still trickling down her face.

'Of course.' She smiled, loving how quickly he was able to solve her problems.

'I love you.' She kissed him softly before taking his hand and following him into their daughter's room.


	14. Time To Pretend

'Serena! I'm so glad that you're home.' Exclaimed Lily, throwing her arms around her daughter.

'Hi mom.' Laughed Serena, thrilled by her mother's excitement. 'Is Willow here? I miss my little sister.'

'No, I'm sorry sweetie but Vanessa took her to the park.'

'What about Rufus?' asked Serena, letting go of her mother.

'He's out buying groceries. Since you, Dan, Eric and Jenny are all home from school we thought we'd cook up a feast.' Giggled Lily, leading her daughter to their couch. 'So, how's school? Tell me all about how your senior year is going.' Well, it would be great if I didn't have a bride-to-be freaking out in my ear constantly.'

'Oh my goodness! Blair must be a nightmare.' Laughed Lily, thrilled to be spending time with her now adult daughter.

'Yes, she is. But it all ends this Saturday at the Plaza when the world will meet Blair Waldorf-Bass.'

'So how about your romantic life? Is there a new boy in your life?'

'Um, no … not exactly.' Serena stammered, avoiding her mother's blue eyes.

'Serena, you've been single for the majority of college. Not that I mind having you home over the weekend instead of off with some guy, but honey are you ok?'

'Yeah, of course.' Insisted Serena. 'I –uh, I don't know.'

'Sweetie, what's wrong? You can tell me.' Lily smiled reassuringly and grabbed her daughter's hand.

'Dan.' Serena sighed, and Lily immediately understood. 'It's been four years, and he's my stepbrother but I can't get over him. I know it sounds crazy –'

'No sweetheart, it doesn't. I couldn't get over Rufus after twenty years. When things are meant to be, time doesn't heal anything. You and Dan have your issues –but something keeps drawing you two together. Learn from my mistakes. I wasted twenty years, do you really want to waste more than four?' Silence engulfed them before Serena's answer pierced the air.

'No.'


	15. I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Blair

'I haven't been to a wedding since ours.' Stated Lily Humphrey as she watched Blair Waldorf walk down the aisle. 'And I never thought it would be Chuck Bass'.' She whispered to her husband, causing him to quietly laugh.

'Be nice Lily.'

'No, I'm thrilled over them. I just can't say that I'm not surprised; Charles was never one to commit to anyone or anything. Blair looks so beautiful.' sighed Lily, completely changing the subject.

'Not as beautiful as you were.' Not it was her turn to laugh.

'Someone wants to get laid tonight. But your statement was accurate.'

'Someone's incredibly cocky.' Joked Rufus, wrapping his arm around her shoulders.

'No I'm n –'

'Relax Lil. You in that dress was … the most beautiful thing I've ever seen.' Lily grinned and cuddled into him before watching Harold give Blair away to her adopted son.

'We should really stop whispering.'

'But we won't.'

'Of course we won't. We're like two teenagers whispering away in maths class.' Rufus squeezed her shoulders and kissed the top of her head.

'We certainly are.'

'Doesn't Willow look gorgeous? I'm so glad that Lanvin started doing a children's line.'

'She looks beautiful, you should take a picture.' Naively suggested Rufus.

'Yes, because I should interrupt the ceremony just so I could get a personal picture of our daughter.' Sarcastically stated Lily, rolling her pallid brown eyes.

'It was just a suggestion –'

'Do you honestly think that Blair hasn't hired at least a dozen photographers? Annie Leibowitz is here, so we'll have tons of amazing pictures of Will –' Lily suddenly stopped speaking, fascinated by the sight in front of her. Charles Bass was kissing his bride with such a large amount of passion that the minister seemed remarkably uncomfortable. And for the first time in her life, watching a wedding didn't make her sad because she was finally in a marriage that she knew would last.


	16. Positive

'Lil, do you feel better?' Rufus Humphrey asked as he entered his penthouse apartment, followed by his two and a half year old daughter. 'Lily, hon, where are you?' Rufus bent down so he was level with his daughter. 'I'm gonna go talk to mommy sweetie. Do you want to watch a movie in the meantime?' Willow nodded, causing her blonde curls to bounce up and down.

'Nemo?' she asked, hopefully biting down on her lip.

'Of course sweetie.' Rufus took his daughter over to their widescreen television before turning on the DVD player and whisking Willow into a world filled with talking fish and vegetarian sharks.

'Thanks daddy.' Grinned Willow, displaying her small pearly white teeth.

'No problem, I'm gonna go check on mommy, ok?' Willow nodded, already fascinated by the images on the screen. 'Lil – where are you?'

'Bathroom.' Croaked Lily, whose answer was followed by the sound of vomiting. Rufus entered their bedroom and found the bathroom door wide open and Lily sitting over the toilet bowl.

'Hey, you feeling better?' his question was answered with a groan and the sound of the toilet flushing.

'Not really. Did you and Willow have fun at the park?' Lily went to the sink and immediately gurgled Colgate mouthwash.

'We didn't go, we went to the pharmacy instead.'

'Why?' Lily asked after spitting out the green liquid into the sink.

'Lily, you've been kneeling by that toilet for the past three weeks. I think we both know what's going on. I picked up a pregnancy test for you to take.'

'Rufus, honestly, it's just a stomach bug. I'll be fine.' Insisted Lily, walking out of the bathroom only to be followed by her husband.

'Lil, why don't you want to take the test? Do you not want another baby?'

'How can you even ask me that Rufus?' Lily asked, thoroughly shocked by the question.

'What am I supposed to think Lil?'

'That I _always_ want to have a child with you, that I _always_ want to be with you. I don't want to take the pregnancy test because we're 42. And the chances of getting pregnant at 42 are much lower than they were for me at 21. And I want to have another child with you more than anything, but I won't get my hopes up only to be completely crushed in the end. This is just a stomach bug.' Lily collapsed on the bed, her body still weak from the constant vomiting.

'Take the test, Lil.' Rufus sat next to her, placing his hand on her back.

'No.' Lily mumbled into the covers.

'Lil, you take the test and either you're pregnant or you're not, in which case we'll try for another baby.' She was instantly sold and shot up like a spring, a smile tugging at her lips.

'Really?' he nodded and she kissed him. 'Pass me the test.'

***

'I swear that this always feels like the longest ten minutes of my life.' Lily muttered as she stared at the timer, wishing for it to ding.

'I know, but we only have two minutes left.'

'I just want to know.' Grumbled Lily, nervously pacing around the bathroom.

'And you will.' Lily continued her pacing but abruptly stopped.

'Where's Willow.' The worry was evident in her voice.

'Watching Finding Nemo.'

'Okay.' Sighed Lily, resuming her pacing before Rufus stopped her by pulling her into his arms. Lily instantly smiled and breathed him in. 'I'm scared.' Tears formed in her eyes and she blinked them back.

'I know.' He rubbed circles into her back, slowly making her less scared.

'I want another child so badly.' The two of them stood together for forty-seven seconds, getting lost in each other before the timer interrupted their moment. 'Can you check for me?'

'We'll do it together.' He kissed her lightly before taking her hand in his and using it to pick up the small white stick. The pink line caused them both to grin.


End file.
